Move Over, Kate and Wills!

So, I think we’ve all heard about (and been creeped out by) the recent marriage of 51-year old actor Doug Hutchinson (if you look up “pervy old dude” in the dictionary, you’ll see his photo. Also, he has an anus mouth) and 16-year old Courtney Stoddard (yes, she is actually 16, despite looking like a 40-something OC divorcée and plastic surgery buff). And it comes as no surprise that they are trolling for a reality show – because, as we all know, appearing on TV – no matter how horrible, desperate, despicable or dimwitted one is portrayed – is the only true measure of success in these United States.

Anyway, the lovebirds (vom) have been giving interviews left and right, declaring their deep and genuine love for one another. And this animated GIF is mesmerizing. Is she having a series of small strokes? Is she being “sexy” (and doing a really fine job of it!)? Is she just so ecstatic over her good-fortune in marrying such a magnificent specimen? Did she just have dental work done and the Novocaine hasn’t worn off? All of these? I don’t know! But I can’t stop watching…

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3 thoughts on “Move Over, Kate and Wills!

  1. I can’t look away! Is she giving him a handjob? So of course I google “doug hutchinson courtney stoddard” to see if I can find the full interview this is from, and guess what? You’re the #2 result, right behind ABC news who don’t have much of use to say except that, according to her mom, she’s a “good Christian girl” and was a virgin when they married. Yours is WAY better.

  2. She is totally on Ecstasy.. People’s eyes roll, they lick their lips like that when they are high on E. And to be married to a guy that much older she would have to be!

  3. I feel sorry for Courtney.
    When she realizes in 2-3 years
    her husband can’t help her career
    wise, the next stop divorce court.

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